My Word I Seeketh

It's true. I dressed like this last night:

My guru totally told me to do it. Or maybe it was me pretending I had one. Whatever the case, I totally felt one with Julia Roberts in the movie theatre, and thought maybe, perhaps, everyone should wear such Indian/Bali inspired wear to Elizabeth Gilbert events. After all, this diary of a book she wrote, became my bible.

You might think when one calls such a book her "bible", that I would want to relive her story. No worries my friends, I am not getting a divorce and running off to perfect my Italian while eating pizza in Naples. For me it was recognizing the constant search a soul goes through and the wonderment of finding ones self/and or God (because to me they are one of the same). I get glimmers of this raw spiritual quest throughout life, and I always take a moment to be in awe of it. However, never did I, until this book, read someones entire journey from being at the their absolute lowest of mercy, to finding purely who they are meant to be. It was inspiring, and to me spoke volumes of spirituality more then a church has in years. After all, it is true that when seeking God, the only true place to find him is within yourself.

So I dressed up in costume. Went for Tapas with some girlfriends, and prepared myself for disappointment, because after all Hollywood was about to do a portrayal of my new found "bible".

It didn't suck. It wasn't earth shattering. It gave life to many parts of the book that I longed for, but I also lost a huge portion of it too. My favorite is her quest in finding God while meditating. I loved the part she felt the blue light fill up her spine, and I kept waiting for "Hollywood's" portrayal. It never came, and that bummed me out. I wanted more Pray and less Eat and Love. I am sure others wanted more Eat or more Love. For me, it was entertaining, but I find myself missing the book. Longing for this dang book I read last November on the beaches of Aruba, a place that fills my soul up. And so... I plan to reread that bad boy on the next vacation we have. I plan to soak it in, and pretend to be a new reader of it. I hope, and plan to take more away, and make use of her story by using it in mine.

I don't plan on going anywhere, or leaving anyone behind, but I do plan to make sense of all that I have learned this year (ex. meeting with Sylvia), and what I am meant to do. Sure I got the easy stuff down: I am meant to be Mom, wife, friend, sister, daughter, teacher...and so on and so forth. However, Eat Pray Love has left me wondering what my word is. What defines me? I always thought it was Spiritual, but since I have been sucked in to the busy life of Mom/Wife I have lost that part of me, and I am fighting like hell to regain it.

Do you have a "word" that defines you as a person? Sums you up without saying the hats you play? Or am I just dumb to think this is significant?